American Beauty.

I by no means have ever called myself a feminist. I have many friends that would characterize themselves with that term, and I have many friends that earn that title. I'm not one of them. I don't think wanting the same things for everyone, including women, make it so I'm out of the ordinary. I'm not a feminist, I'm human. I'm just MacKenzie Jo. But... I just read something, and it wrinkled my bridges (litchrally the best term on the planet) so I need to get a little preachy here.

A friend on Facebook posted a status stating how one actress was prettier than another. He phrased it almost like a question. 'Hey remember when this chick was hotter than this other one? Me too.' A very innocent statement. A very innocent opinion he's allowed to have. I immediately typed a comment 'Remember when they both were beautiful? Me too.' But I couldn't send the rebuttal. One, I know this guy would never be cruel and I know he would never want anyone to feel lesser. Two, it's none of my business if he does or does not find someone attractive.

It does make me a bit sad though. There are people out there that don't see the beauty in me if I'm standing next to a girl who's legs go for days or who's hair is the right color. We fight, every day, men and women, to show that we belong in a world where everyone wishes for more. To be better. To be skinnier. To be in a different body because you haven't yet realized that you're exactly who you're supposed to be. And the opinions of others, no matter how innocent, can wreck you and cause you to completely reevaluate you're entire being. If we're fighting to belong, yet striving to change, we'll never stop. We'll never stop comparing two beautiful women and posting about it to see if people agree. We'll never stop double/triple checking how tight our jeans look in the mirror because we're worried people will see every fault in our bones. We'll never stop wishing for a more defined style, whatever that means.

That's not how I want to live. That's not how I want to spend my days. Most days I rather enjoy my skin. There are without a doubt things to work on, but I'd like to think the things I want to better about myself will help define my character, not my image. I don't want to worry what Boy 1 is thinking and how that differs from Boys 2-6. I want to worry about if I'm giving out good and doing my best to recognize when I get good back. That should matter more. The good in life. Not the image. Not the outward beauty... The quiet confidence after a really good meeting. The smile as you walk away from a stranger having learned something new. The ideas that fill your mind as you listen to a new song on the radio. The laughter when someone slips on ice and realizes he's not alone in the moment. That's the good stuff, that's the beauty. That's what we need to start comparing.

Example: How do you react when you fall on the ice? Really? You cry? Yeah, me too. Let's go get coffee and talk about our love of doughnuts. I THINK YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL. AND YOU HAVE A BEARD.

That's my definition of beautiful. The similarities and the differences and the beards and the hilarity of embarrassing yourself. Not the tanned skinned, not the nicest clothes, not the perfect answers. We need to recognize, I'm absolutely including myself in this, we need to recognize the times when we're becoming more about image and less about character. Does it really matter if Celebrity 1 is 'hotter' than Celebrity 2...maybe for their agents, but definitely not for you. You should worry about if you're drowning in a puddle on the side of the road because you've tripped on litchrally air... if a person will save you from your embarrassment or if they will shout 'someone saw that' and keep walking by. Because that happens... or am I alone in that story....?

Cheers to the many versions of beauty, cheers to innocent opinions, cheers to snow.